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Home > Humorous Greeting Cards > Funny Greeting Cards

Funny Greeting Cards - Classic Quotes With Funny Photos

Check out are these very funny quote cards - great quotes with hilarious pictures - perfect for birthday, or any occasion - from Borealis Press and QuoteArts.com. Great combinations of funny quotations and entertaining pictures. We dare you to try not to laugh.



Immoral Illegal Or Fattening - Card
"All the things I really like to do are either immoral, illegal, or fattening." ~ Alexander Woollcott
Reg. Price: $2.95
Sale Price: $2.07
Hold Tight And Pretend It's A Plan - Funny Greeting Card
"Hold tight and pretend it's a plan." ~ Steven Moffat
Reg. Price: $3.50
Sale Price: $2.45
Lose Your Mind - Card
"They tell me that you'll lose your mind when you grow older. What they don't tell you is that you won't miss it very much." ~ Malcolm Cowley
Reg. Price: $3.50
Sale Price: $2.45
Life Is A Daring Adventure - Card
"Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing."
Reg. Price: $3.50
Sale Price: $2.45
Start With A Smile - Card
"Start every day with a smile, and get it over with."
Reg. Price: $3.50
Sale Price: $2.45
I Always Wanted To Be Somebody - Funny Greeting Card
"I always wanted to be somebody, but I realize I should have been more specific." Lily Tomlin
Reg. Price: $2.95
Sale Price: $2.07
Only Young Once - Card
"You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely."
Reg. Price: $2.95
Sale Price: $2.07
Ever Stop To Think  - Greeting Card
"Did you ever stop to think, and then forget to start again?"
Reg. Price: $2.95
Sale Price: $2.07
You Only Live Once - Greeting Card
"You only live once, but if you work it right, once is enough."
Reg. Price: $3.50
Sale Price: $2.45
Everyone Thinks They Have The Best Dog - All Occasion Card
"Everyone thinks they have the best dog, and none of them are wrong." ~ W.R. Purche
Reg. Price: $3.50
Sale Price: $2.45
If Cats Could Talk - Greeting Card
"If cats could talk, they wouldn't." ~ Nan Porter
Reg. Price: $3.50
Sale Price: $2.45
My Life To Live Again - Card
"If I had my life to live again, I would make the same mistakes, only sooner." ~ Tallulah Bankhead
Reg. Price: $2.95
Sale Price: $2.07
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Education Is A Wonderful Thing - Greeting Card
"Education is a wonderful thing. If you couldn't sign your name you'd have to pay cash." ~ Rita Mae Brown
Reg. Price: $2.95
Sale Price: $2.07
Maturity Is A Phase - Greeting Card
"Maturity is a phase. Adolescence is forever."
Reg. Price: $2.95
Sale Price: $2.07
Women Don't Retire - Greeting Card
"Women don't retire, they just keep on cooking."
Reg. Price: $2.95
Sale Price: $2.07
Life Is One Fool Thing - Greeting Card
"Life is one fool thing after another, whereas love is two fool things after each other." ~ Oscar Wilde
Reg. Price: $2.95
Sale Price: $2.07
Dance First Think Later - Greeting Card
"Dance first. Think later. It's the natural order." ~ Samuel Beckett
Reg. Price: $3.50
Sale Price: $2.45
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Too Much Of A Good Thing - Greeting Card
"Too much of a good thing can be wonderful." ~Mae West
Reg. Price: $2.95
Sale Price: $2.07
Inside Every Older Lady - Greeting Card
"Inside every older lady is a young woman wondering what the hell happened." ~Unknown
Reg. Price: $3.50
Sale Price: $2.45
Don't Dwell On Reality - Greeting Card
"Don't dwell on reality. It will only keep you from greatness." ~ Rev. Randall R. McBride, Jr.
Reg. Price: $2.95
Sale Price: $2.07
Remember Misers - Greeting Card
"Remember MISERS? They could SAVE money!"
Reg. Price: $2.95
Sale Price: $2.07
Supply Of Good Women - Greeting Card
"The supply of good women far exceeds that of men who deserve them." ~ Robert Graves
Reg. Price: $2.95
Sale Price: $2.07
I Used To Be Snow White - Greeting Card
"I used to be Snow White, but then I drifted." ~ Mae West
Reg. Price: $2.95
Sale Price: $2.07
The Greatest Pleasure - Greeting Card
"The greatest pleasure in life is doing what other people say you cannot do." ~ Walter Bagehot
Reg. Price: $2.95
Sale Price: $2.07
Two Kinds of Men  - Greeting Card
"I only like two kinds of men, domestic and imported" ~ Mae West
Reg. Price: $2.95
Sale Price: $2.07
Never Wanted To Be A Millionaire  - Greeting Card
"I never wanted to be a millionaire, just to lve like one." ~ Walter Hagen
Reg. Price: $2.95
Sale Price: $2.07
People Our Parents Warned Us About  - Greeting Card
"We have become the kind of people our parents warned us about." ~ Augustus John
Reg. Price: $2.95
Sale Price: $2.07
I Don't Want Realistic  - Borealis Press Greeting Card
"I don't want realistic! I want magic!" ~ Tennessee Williams
Reg. Price: $2.95
Sale Price: $2.07
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I Intend To Remain Young Indefinitely - Borealis Press Greeting Card
"I intend to remain young indefinitely." ~ Mary Pickford
Reg. Price: $2.95
Sale Price: $2.07
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Women Are Like Tea Bags - Borealis Press Greeting Card
"Women are like tea bags. We don't know our strength until we are in hot water." ~ Eleanor Roosevelt
Reg. Price: $3.50
Sale Price: $2.45
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Wise Enough To Never Grow Up - Greeting Card
"I was wise enough to never grow up, while fooling other people into believing that I had." ~ Margaret Mead
Reg. Price: $2.95
Sale Price: $2.07
Nice Knowing Someone Like You - Borealis Press Greeting Card
"It's nice knowing someone like you. Someone to lean on, someone to count on, someone to tell on." ~ Unknown
Reg. Price: $2.95
Sale Price: $2.07
Only One Thing Wrong With The Younger Generation - Borealis Press Greeting Card
"There is only one thing wrong with the younger generation: some of us don't belong to it anymore." ~Bernard Baruch
Reg. Price: $3.50
Sale Price: $2.45
Boys Will Be Boys - Borealis Press Greeting Card
"Boys will be boys, and so will a lot of middle-aged men." ~ Frank McKinney Hubbard
Reg. Price: $2.95
Sale Price: $2.07
Man Smart, Woman Smarter - Borealis Press Greeting Card
"Man smart. Woman smarter." ~ Norman Span
Reg. Price: $2.95
Sale Price: $2.07
Every Day I Look At The Richest People - Borealis Press Greeting Card
"Every day I look through the list of the richest people. If I'm not there, I get up and go to work." ~ Robert Orben
Reg. Price: $2.95
Sale Price: $2.07
When You're Middle-Aged - Funny Greeting Card
"When you're middle-aged, the mischief is mainly in your head." ~ David Williams
Reg. Price: $2.95
Sale Price: $2.07
A Happy Childhood Is The Worst Preparation - Funny Greeting Card
"A happy childhood is the worst preparation for life." ~ Kinky Friedman
Reg. Price: $2.95
Sale Price: $2.07
Any Idiot Can Face A Crisis - Funny Greeting Card
"Any idiot can face a crisis. It's day-to-day living that wears you out." ~ Anton Chekhov
Reg. Price: $3.50
Sale Price: $2.45
If A Dog's Prayers Were Answered - Funny Greeting Card
"If a dog's prayers were answered, bones would fall from the sky." ~ Old proverb
Reg. Price: $2.95
Sale Price: $2.07
If They Can Send One Man To The Moon - Funny Greeting Card
"If they can send one man to the moon, why can't they send them all?" ~ Unknown
Reg. Price: $2.95
Sale Price: $2.07
Anyone Can Be Cool - Quotable Card
"Anyone can be cool, but awesome takes practice." ~ Lorraine Peterson
Reg. Price: $3.50
Sale Price: $2.45
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A Girl Knows Her Limits - Funny Greeting Card
"A girl knows her limits, but a wise girl knows she has none." ~ Norma Jean Mortenson (Marilyn Monroe)
Reg. Price: $3.50
Sale Price: $2.45
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The Threat of A Woman - Funny Card
"It is rare to see, in a little boy, the promise of a man, but in a little girl one can almost always see the threat of a woman." ~ Alexandre Dumas
Reg. Price: $3.50
Sale Price: $2.45
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When A Dog Is Not Preferable To A Man - Funny Greeting Card
"There are times when a dog is not preferable to a man." ~ Mark Montague
Reg. Price: $2.95
Sale Price: $2.07
Laugh And The World Laughs With You - Funny Greeting Card
"Laugh, and the world laughs with you." ~ Ella Wheeler Wilcox
Reg. Price: $2.95
Sale Price: $2.07
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Happiness Does Not Notice The Passing Of Time - Funny Greeting Card
"Happiness does not notice the passing of time." ~ Chinese proverb
Reg. Price: $3.50
Sale Price: $2.45
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To Live Is So Startling - Funny Greeting Card
"To live is so startling that it leaves little time for anything else." ~ Emily Dickinson
Reg. Price: $2.95
Sale Price: $2.07
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Man Who Says His Wife Can't Take A Joke - Funny Greeting Card
"The man who says his wife can't take a joke forgets that she took him." ~ Oscar Wilde
Reg. Price: $3.50
Sale Price: $2.45
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If I Look Confused  -  Funny All Occasion Card
"If I look confused, it's because I'm thinking." ~ Samuel Goldwyn
Reg. Price: $2.95
Sale Price: $2.07
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People Who Make Me Laugh  -  Funny All Occasion Card
"I love people who make me laugh." ~ Audrey Hepburn
Reg. Price: $3.50
Sale Price: $2.45
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No I Won't Grow Up  -  Funny All Occasion Card
"No. I won't grow up." ~ J.M. Barrie
Reg. Price: $3.50
Sale Price: $2.45
My Cup Runneth Over -  All Occasion Card
"My cup runneth over." ~ the Bible, Psalm 23
Reg. Price: $3.50
Sale Price: $2.45
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You Can Learn Many Things From Children -  All Occasion Card
"You can learn many things from children. How much patience you have, for instance." ~ Franklin P. Jones
Reg. Price: $3.50
Sale Price: $2.45
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Knitting Soothes The Troubled Spirit -  All Occasion Card
"Properly practiced, knitting soothes the troubled spirit, and it doesn't hurt the untroubled spirit either." ~ Elizabeth Zimmerman
Reg. Price: $3.50
Sale Price: $2.45
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There Are Shortcuts To Happiness -  All Occasion Card
"There are shortcuts to happiness, and dancing is one of them." ~ Vicki Baum
Reg. Price: $3.50
Sale Price: $2.45
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You Are The High In My Noon - Quotable Card
"You are the HIGH in my NOON, the FLAP in my JACK..." ~ H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
Reg. Price: $3.50
Sale Price: $2.45
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Be Yourself. Everybody Else Is Taken - Quotable Card
"Be yourself. Everybody else is taken." ~ Oscar Wilde
Reg. Price: $3.50
Sale Price: $2.45
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Coffee First Schemes Later - Funny All Occasion Card
"Coffee first. Schemes later." ~ Leanna Renee Hieber
Reg. Price: $3.50
Sale Price: $2.45
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There Is No Psychiatrist Like A Nuzzle - Funny All Occasion Card
"There is no psychiatrist like a nuzzle."
Reg. Price: $3.50
Sale Price: $2.45
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There are many, many other funny cards in the Borealis Press collection.
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