 "I base most of my fashion taste on what doesn't itch." $2.95 |  "Life is one damned thing after another." ~ Elbert Hubbard $2.95 |
 "Wild women don't get the blues." ~ Ida Prather Cox $2.95 |  "They tell me that you'll lose your mind when you grow older. What they don't tell you is that you won't miss it very much." ~ Malcolm Cowley $2.95 |
 "Act Normal. That's already crazy enough." $2.95 |  "You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely." $2.95 |
 "Start every day with a smile, and get it over with." $2.95 |  "Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing." $2.95 |
 "What good can come from a day that starts with getting up." $2.95 |  "Act Normal. That's already crazy enough." $2.95 |
 "Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new." $2.50 |  "If cats could talk, they wouldn't." ~ Nan Porter $2.95 |
 "Women and cats will do as they damn well please. Men and dogs had better get used to it." $2.95 |  "All the things I really like to do are either immoral, illegal, or fattening." ~ Alexander Woollcott $2.95 |
 "Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away." $2.50 |  "There are times not to flirt: When you're sick. When you're with children. When you're on the witness stand." $2.50 |
 "A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history, with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila." $2.50 |  "I have noticed that the people who are late are often so much jollier then the people who have to wait for them." ~ E. V. Lucas $2.50 |
 "I think that maybe if women and children were in charge we would get somewhere." $2.95 |  "Act Normal. That's already crazy enough." $2.95 |
 "Whoever caused things to be this way, I hope they catch him." ~ Ashleigh Brilliant $2.95 |  "The battle of the sexes is a lost cause. There's too much fraternizing with the enemy." $2.50 |
 "Never have children, only grandchildren." $2.95 |  "It is not true that life is one damn thing after another. It is one damn thing over and over." $2.50 |
 "My life has a superb cast, but I can't figure out the plot." $2.95 |  "The longer she dates me, the better she looks." $2.50 |
 "The trouble with resisting temptation is that you may not get another chance." $2.95 |  "One must stay sober: not always, but most of the time." $2.50 |
 "Growing Old, it's not nice, but it's interesting." $2.50 |  "When we remember that we are all mad, the mysteries of life disappear." $2.95 |
 "There is no real reason to do housework. After a few years it doesn't get any worse." $2.50 |  "Let the wonders begin." $2.95 |
 "What dreadful hot weather we have! It keeps me in a continual state of inelegance." $2.95 |  "A woman's work is never done…" $2.95 |
 "What better success than to live well, laugh lots, and love much?" $2.50 |  "In order to be irreplaceable, one must always be different." ~Coco Chanel $2.95 |
 "Opportunity may knock only once, but temptation leans on the doorbell." $2.95 |  "Did you ever stop to think, and then forget to start again?" $2.95 |
 "You only live once, but if you work it right, once is enough." $2.95 |  "Housework never killed anybody, but why take a chance?" ~ Edgar Bergen and Phyllis Diller $2.95 |
 "Doesn't being normal just drive you crazy?" $2.95 |  "Too much of a good thing can be wonderful." ~Mae West $2.95 |
 "My goal is to do something outrageous every day." ~ Maggie Kuhn $2.95 |  "If you want a thing done well, get a couple of old broads to do it." ~Bette Davis $2.95 |
 "Of all the things we have lost, it is our mind that we miss the most." $2.50 |  "The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about yor age." ~ Lucille Ball $2.50 |
 "There used to be a real me, but I had it surgically removed." ~ Peter Sellers $2.50 |  "Start every day with a smile, and get it over with." ~ W. C. Fields $2.50 |
 "Everything I understand, I understand only because of love." ~ Leo Tolstoy $2.50 |  "I have the simplest of tastes. I am always satisfied with the best." ~ Oscar Wilde $2.50 |
 "All of the things I really like to do are either illegal, immoral, or fattening." ~ Alexander Woolcott $2.50 |  "We'd all like to vote for the best man, but she's never a candidate." ~ Frank McKinney Hubbard $2.50 |
 "There was a time when fools and their money were soon parted. Now it happens to everybody." ~ Adlai Stevenson $2.50 |  "I always have a quotation for everything. It saves original thinking." ~ Dorothy L. Sayers $2.50 |
 "Act Normal. That's already crazy enough." ~ Dutch proverb $2.50 |  "Anybody who doesn't know what soap tastes like has never washed a dog." ~ Franklin P. Jones $2.50 |
 "It is hard enough to remember my opinions, let alone remembering my reasons for them." ~ Frederick Nietzche $2.50 |  "The older I get, The faster I was." ~ Charles Barkley $2.50 |
 "All progress is based on a universal innate desire on the part of every organism to live beyond its income." ~ Samuel Butler $2.50 |  "The best way to impress a girl? Roast her a chicken." ~ Janice Plourde $2.50 |
 "You can do anything in this world if you're prepared to take the consequences." ~ W. Somerset Maugham $2.50 |  "A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of." ~ Ogden Nash $2.50 |
 "All men are intrinsical rascals, and I am only sorry that not being a dog I can't bite them." ~ Lord Byron $2.50 |  "The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd rather not." ~ Mark Twain $2.50 |
 "To exercise is human. Not to is divine." ~ Robert Orben $2.50 |  "No man is ever old enough to know better." ~ Holbrook Jackson $2.50 |
 "You can observe a lot by looking." ~ Yogi Berra $2.50 |